Between us, we competed in Lucha Libre wrestling, tried in vain to munch a 2.25-pound bacon cheeseburger, handled scorpions and tarantulas, entered a pie-eating contest and nearly got gored to death in the Extreme Rodeo. Ah, memories.

After 21 awesome days, we’re beat. While we’re a little sad the fair is over, our fiancees will be happy to have us both back at home. Many thanks to everyone who visited the blog! Until next year…

…Niyaz and Jeff

It’s closing time, and we’re obliged to offer some serious thanks to the fair stalwarts who made 50+ posts on this blog and 16 Register stories possible.

Above everyone else, fair spokesfolks Jeff Willson and Sabrina Sakaguchi did superhuman jobs, taking our every call, answering our every question, arranging interviews and even getting us into the wrestling and bullfighting rings. We wanted to take a picture of them, but they’re modest, so we’ll just describe them: Jeff is tall, well-built and has a ravishing shock of long hair that would make Fabio envious; Sabrina is short, trim and has a smile that could charm the most ornery of goats.

Our other thanks go to those who kept our stomachs full. Janie Mederos of Pepe’s Mariscos served us something on the order of 23 fish tacos and a half-dozen cups of aguas frescas throughout the fair, always with a smile. Muchas gracias, Janie.

And then there’s legendary “deep-fry king” Charlie Boghosian, who would hail us down every time we passed his booth to regale us with tales of deep-fried Fig Newtons and stuff us full of various batter-encapsulated treats…thanks for the Oreos. Much love, Charlie.

Between the Hucowamongous Burger and the Lucha Libre, I’ve been on Jeff’s case about taking one for the team. He jumped into the arena as a rodeo clown and nearly got killed by a bull that almost blindsided him. Seriously, he took one for the team.

Enjoy clips from the extreme rodeo with in-ring commentary by our thankfully-still-alive Jeff Overley.

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Ladies and gentlemen, it’s our pleasure to introduce you to Lake Forest resident Andy Miller, also known as The Urban Conan. We caught this scruffy young lad sporting a tight t-shirt and way-too-short shorts near Baja Blues and knew we had found our guy. Somebody get Andy a studded headband and a broadsword so he can pillage the game booths for stuffed animals.

…and don’t forget to check out Volume I and Volume II!

At last week’s cattle drive in Huntington Beach, a 2-year-old border collie named Tuffy ran away from the herd. He lives on a wide-open ranch in Modesto and apparently was spooked by the big crowd of spectators. His parents, John and Sandy Luiz, who own 15 dogs, drove around looking for him, to no avail. With jobs to get back to, they had to leave without little Tuffy. “It was horrible,” Sandy tells us.

But then, on Tuesday, calls started coming in. Tuffy had been spotted at a golf course. Tuffy had been seen roaming a neighborhood. The Luizes drove all night, and arrived at a gated community off Goldenwest Street where Tuffy was reportedly holed up.

People set out food and water in an attempt to lure Tuffy out. Police and animal control officers found the pup, but he was too fast for them (he’s also known as “Bullet”). But when John and Sandy arrived, the pooch knew his masters. The reunited family thanked everyone involved and drove back to Modesto - and little Tuffy, after six days on his own, slept the whole way home.

Looking for a thrill, we asked the beekeepers to coat my arm in bees; fortunately, they said no. So, it was off to the Webs, Wings and Creepy Things exhibit, where Matthew Weekes from Cal State Fullerton’s graduate biology program was happy to let us get up close and personal with a whiptail scorpion, an African millipede and a giant tarantula.

Aside from being really disgusting, the bugs perform important functions - the scorpion eats crickets by the bowlful, the tarantula gobbles up mosquitos and the forest-dwelling millipede aids in the decomposition of fallen fruits. Oh, and as we learned a bit too late, the tarantula can also cause horrible rashes.

… Jeff

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One-year-old fair-goer Ernie Ortiz of Santa Ana looked pooped but ultra-cool as a pair of shades covered his dozing eyes. Seventeen days into the fair, we’d be lying if we didn’t say we’re ready for a nap of our own.

To check out Volume I, click here!

Meet 15-year-old Fernando (no relation to the Dodgers pitcher) Valenzuela of Santa Ana, a parking attendant at the fair. To spice things up and pass the time, Valenzuela gets his boogie on while directing fair-goers to their parking spots.

When we showed up to talk with Fernando, he was staffed at a slow gate, so we got him moved to the main entrance where he could really shake his moneymaker. Apparently he really gets his groove on at night, when he’s armed with glowsticks, but he’s a hit even in daytime, drawing honks and whistles from passing motorists.

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If so, you’re not alone. So far this year, three strollers have turned up at the fair’s lost and found. Perhaps the infants learned to walk during their family’s fair visit - your guess is as good as ours. So far, about 250 people have been re-united with lost purses, car keys and the like. A trove of cell phones and sunglasses notwithstanding, here are some other unique finds at the lost and found:

*A wallet with about $700 in cash.
*A giant bag of fur-trimmed petticoats.
*A panda bear backpack.
*A homemade lace umbrella and magic wand.
*A picture of a man and boy (presumably a father and son) draped by a giant python.